How Do I Return To God's Presence?

I've gotten this question a couple of times and sometimes, I have found myself asking it... First things first, let go of the guilt. Guilt is NOT of God. If it lasts more than 5-15 seconds, that's the devil playing games with you. Holy guilt leads you to repentance, if it's keeping you FROM returning then it's not of God.

So you have been away for too long.. or maybe it's a week, a few days, however long it is. Remind yourself that God loves it when you come back. Forreal. When I find myself wanting to reach out but afraid and ashamed that I have to say "I'm sorry" for the one thousandth time, I remind myself that He wants me back. Like His hands are literally wide open waiting to receive you. God yearns for your presence.

So how do I start? Well it depends.
When it's a few days I find that I just go on my knees, with a bit of shame on my face but a hopeful heart because God doesn't disappoint. There are times I wouldn't pray for a whole week, kneel down and find His presence resting over me. Like I never left. I don't know if this is just me but I like to believe there is special grace upon my life. And I keep up, we can't be falling off every few weeks, there should be levels to thisssssss.

When it's been a while, weeks or so, we should really try to avoid this.

Start by listening to sermons on Youtube, slowly begin to replace whatever music you've been listening to with some worship music. Begin to visit your Bible app a lot more. Check out that online devotional you haven't visited in a while. The longer you have been away, the harder it is to return; these preparatory steps are to slowly start transforming your mind and putting your spirit in lead. They serve to counteract those lies the devil is probably feeding you that you are too ruined to return. Feed yourself with the right things and when you are able to, fall on your knees. Actually, you might find yourself prostrating on the floor because you are genuinely sorry for neglecting Abba for that long. And if there's a sin that you have committed that keeps bothering you, start confessing immediately (I suggest Psalms 51). We are humans and God's love is unconditional, He will receive you with welcoming arms. (All this is said with the assumption that you didn't stop attending church services. If you did, boyyyy that is the first step, start going to church again.)

Now, please, please... I beg you in the name of God. Stop running away. Remain here. I'm sure you already know this is the only place there is joy, peace and happiness. Remain here.
Watch out for next post on how to stay in His Presence.

Stay Grateful!

The Veil Has Been Torn (Bible Passage)

        Now rid off the shackles my victory is yours

        I tore "the veil" for you to come close

        There's no reason to stand at a distance anymore 

        You're not far from home (Out of Hiding by Steffany Gretzinger)

I've had this song on repeat for weeks now; the lyrics is just amazing. I've done two dance ministrations to it but I still can't get enough. The whole album is FIRE, y'all should check it out. 

Today I read Leviticus 15 and 16. Quite frankly, it's been rough reading through the book of Leviticus. I resist the urge to say that it's boring but today when I sat down to read my Bible, I told God that I refuse to zoom through the chapters without getting any understanding.

I like to write when I read my bible (both in my journal and directly in my Bible). I know I enjoyed a chapter when I have written all over it. Well I just flipped through my Leviticus thus far and there is barely anything written down except for today.....

Leviticus 16 speaking about the Day of Atonement. I'm just going to give a run down of the chapter.

Leviticus 15:31 - “Thus you shall keep the people of Israel separate from their uncleanness, lest they die in their uncleanness by defiling my tabernacle that is in their midst.”

Because our uncleanness (AKA our sins) can kill us. Remember Aaron's sons who offered strange fire to God.... well fire consumed them and they died. When the people defiled the tabernacle of God, it led to instant death.

"Aaron shall offer the bull as a sin offering for himself and shall make atonement for himself and for his house." - Leviticus 16:6

Aaron had to make atonement for his own sins and that of his family before he could atone for the people's sins. When he was done with that, he would kill one goat and sprinkle its blood behind "the veil" on the mercy seat as a sin offering for the people to God. 

"Then he shall kill the goat of the sin offering that is for the people and bring its blood inside the veil and do with its blood as he did with the blood of the bull, sprinkling it over the mercy seat and in front of the mercy seat." - Leviticus 16:15

For the second goat, Aaron would place his hand on the goat's head and literally name all the sins of the people so the goat can bear those iniquities before it is sent into the wilderness. 

"And Aaron shall lay both his hands on the head of the live goat, and confess over it all the iniquities of the people of Israel, and all their transgressions, all their sins. And he shall put them on the head of the goat and send it away into the wilderness by the hand of a man who is in readiness." - Leviticus 16:21

And when I was reading this whole list of what Aaron had to do on the day of atonement so the people's iniquities can be forgiven, all that ran through my head was "Didi you don't have to do this."

The fact that when Jesus died on that cross... when He said "It is finished," it truly was finished. That veil was TORN!!! I don't need to watch Aaron go behind any veil to atone for my sins, I can come into the presence of my father! Because Jesus presented Himself as the great high priest, because He is the perfect sacrifice, I have direct access to God.

What is the veil? The veil is where the priest would sprinkle the blood of animals to symbolically transfer the sins of the people to the sanctuary. So whenever someone would bring a sin offering, the blood gets sprinkled on the veil (and the horns of the altar of incense). The Day of Atonement is observed to cleanse the sanctuary of the accumulated sins and it's done once a year. Now imagine that veil being torn? It means I don't have to make atonements for my sins to enter the presence of God because that price has been paid once and for all.

Can I plead with you about something? Please don't take what Jesus did on that cross for you for granted. I want you to know that when He was taking his last breath, He was thinking of how you could now enjoy a close relationship with God. 

He has removed our sins as far from us
    as the east is from the west." - Psalm 103:12

That is what He did for you and me. Let us not relent in our pursuit of that intimate relationship with our father. If He didn't care for us, He wouldn't have sent Jesus.....

Love and Peace always..

Oh and who said the bible is boring again? I stand corrected LOL.

The Comparison Game

Comparison; the act or instance of comparing (estimating, measuring, or noting the similarity or dissimilarity between).

Do you ever just... Have you ever found yourself comparing yourself to others? It's real out here man, especially in this period in my life. Graduation is fast approaching, people are getting into graduate school, everyone is making moves. Looks like I'm the only one who is stagnant..  Like what in the world is going on? Why did she get that and not me? Why didn't they call me for that? Even this girl I'm supposedly better than (Lord help me) is getting opportunities left and right. When will my own time come? I'm trying to understand God what is the purpose of right now? I don't seem to be moving anywhere; things are not working out. How am I suppose to trust you if there's nothing to trust you about this season?

Can I just be real with y'all? The seed of comparison and envy have been pulling on me real hard lately. The beginning months of this year have been so unfruitful (at least by my judgement) that it has me questioning God from time to time and I wonder if anyone else is on the same boat as me. I love the Bible y'all and I'm about to unpack every verse that reminds me that I am relevant, that God is not done with me and that I need to trust Him even in this season. Because at the end of the day the word of God is my only weapon.

"You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed." - Psalm 139:16
God knows every single day of my life even before they played out. His hand is in this moment.

"For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." - Jeremiah 29:11

"Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you." - 1 Peter 2:9

"And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them." - Romans 8:28

"For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise." - 2 Corinthians 10:12

After you have fed on these verses, I encourage you to reduce your social media presence. You have a higher tendency to compare yourself with others when you spend a lot of time viewing other people's lives. Post and leave, you can delete the app until you have something to post again. Also begin to focus on the things that are going well in your life even if it is one thing; hold onto that and do it diligently. Thirdly, rejoice with people who are rejoicing, ask God for genuine happiness so you can celebrate with them without having an envious heart and stop thinking you're better than anyone. Lastly, your time is coming, if God has said, He will do it.

"God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind. - Numbers 23:19

"You want what you don’t have, so you scheme and kill to get it. You are jealous of what others have, but you can’t get it, so you fight and wage war to take it away from them. Yet you don’t have what you want because you don’t ask God for it." - James 4:2

Rest in His will for you, God got you.

PS: I started making video journals to document the stages I'm going through in this year. It's been a lot of low moments but I can't wait to see how great this year will turn. We will reap this fruit of this moment.